"When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie..."

"... My grace, all sufficient, shall be thy supply. The flame shall not hurt the, I only design/Thy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine." - Foundation (one of my favorite hymns)

That verse - the whole hymn, actually - feels very applicable to my life during the last couple months. I've certainly been growing in my walk with God and maturing as a young woman, but it has often been through painful or very humbling circumstances. For those of you who care to read the ramblings of a work in progress, read on. If not... I don't blame you. (Too much.) ;-)

You know those days when you can't seem to do anything right, when you feel like you've messed up for the thousand and oneth time ("I should have learned this lesson by the thousandth time..." - Barlow Girl), when you wonder what on earth God was doing when He called you - of all people? I had a couple of days like that these past couple weeks. They're not fun, but we've all had them. The amazing thing is that the grace of God is deeper than our darkest mood, and never fails to draw us back to Him and into His loving arms. "...He who promised is faithful."

"God will never become disillusioned with you; He never had an illusions in the first place." - my mom. Have you ever thought about that? He doesn't need us to put on a show when we come before Him - in fact, I think it's probably a little insulting to the Cross of Christ when we feel that we need or ought to - (1) because, before God, we are already righteous; and (2), because He already knows the true condition our hearts and minds. That gives me pause when I think about it, and causes me to look at prayer in a whole new way when I've forgotten how intimately God already knows me.

There has been a book, "Emotional Purity," that God has greatly used in refining me these last couple days. For those interested in such a topic (male or female, married or single), I would highly recommend the book. I was surprised to find that it didn't just deal with emotions, but also very practically about the way we live our lives as followers of Christ. It helped me to 'name and claim' a couple of the things (sins) that I have recently been dealing with, and I am very grateful for that. (Thank again, Jane, for loaning me the book!)

Anyway, all of this is to say that we serve an awesome God, who is "faithful and just to forgive us our sins," faithful to seek out the wandering hearts of His servants, and more than enough to satisfy any heart. I am in awe of His love and grace.